You say "I truly am in love with him" and "I cheated on the best thing that has ever happened to me, my boyfriend of 8 years" ... so - why cheat? I just don't get it.
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You further say "We have had sex about 5 times in the last 5 months" ... I am struggling with getting my head around this - you are totally in love with your boyfriend but still had sex with someone else FIVE times - I would have thought after the first time you should have been shocked back in to reality - because of how much you say you love your boyfriend.
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... and if you care about him more than you care about yourself (which, again, you have stated) then you will do the decent thing and admit to him the FULL extent of what you did to him behind his back - he deserves nothing less.
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It sucks but maybe you both could use some time to date others before thinking about marriage. You are both young and have plenty of time to worry about stuff like that. Then maybe years down the road you two will reunite, and can move past the past.
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